The cult.ture podcast

32-Blood Doctrine, Programming & Conditional Love | Audrey’s Story

Audrey joins Trent and Derek to share her experience growing up as a Jehovah’s Witness and what ultimately led her to leave in 2025.
In this episode, Audrey opens up about the emotional pressure of trying to live a “perfect” life inside the organization, the fear surrounding blood transfusions, purity culture, elder involvement in marriage and sexuality, conditional relationships, and the difficult process of rebuilding life outside the religion.
We also explore what it’s like waking up while married to a non-Witness, the emotional pull to return, navigating family dynamics, and learning how to trust yourself after years inside a high-control belief system.
Audrey’s story is raw, honest, emotional, and deeply human.
If you’ve ever questioned a system of control or struggled with rebuilding your identity after leaving one, this conversation may resonate with you.
 
Follow Audrey:TikTok: @audrey.breaks.free
Instagram: @_audrey_la_latinga_
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 

31-Lydia's Story: Approved, Watched, Controlled

In this episode, we sit down with Lydia, a former Jehovah’s Witness who grew up in a fourth-generation family deeply rooted in the organization.
From a young age, Lydia was seen as “exemplary”, giving talks at assemblies, pioneering, and doing everything expected of her. But beneath the praise was something else: pressure, anxiety, and a growing disconnect from her own identity.
We explore what it’s like to grow up performing your worth, the subtle ways control shows up through approval, and how even “good” experiences can carry hidden weight.
Lydia shares her journey through waking up, navigating therapy, redefining identity, and processing moments that only later revealed themselves as harmful or inappropriate.
This conversation is about more than leaving a belief system.It’s about learning how to think, feel, and choose for yourself for the first time.
If you’ve ever questioned your identity, your worth, or the system you were raised in, this one will resonate.
 
Griswold Creative House
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 

30-Breaking Free from a Catholic Cult: Ryan’s Story

Ryan, host of The Truth That Heals, joins us to share his story of growing up Catholic and eventually being pulled into a high-control religious group that claimed legitimacy within the Church.
What began as a calling rooted in faith turned into over a decade of control, fear, and psychological manipulation.
In this episode, we explore:
How spiritual language is used to recruit and control
The role of fear, guilt, and “divine calling”
What it’s like to live inside a constantly evolving belief system
The moment things started to crack
And what it takes to finally walk away
This is a conversation about identity, autonomy, and the courage to question what you were taught to never doubt.
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 
 
 
 

29-Everything Changed: How Jordan Left a High-Control Religion

What happens when you choose yourself… and lose everything?
In this episode of cult.ture, Derek is joined by Jordan, a former Jehovah’s Witness who shares his journey of waking up and walking away from a high-control religious system.
Jordan opens up about:
Growing up in the Jehovah’s Witness organization
Struggling with identity and sexuality inside a restrictive belief system
The moment everything started to unravel
Being shunned by family
The emotional reality of “losing” people who are still alive
Finding healing, voice, and purpose through sharing his story
This conversation explores the deep psychological and emotional impact of leaving high-control groups and what it takes to rebuild your identity on your own terms.
If you’ve ever questioned your beliefs, felt the weight of conditional love, or are navigating life after a controlling environment, this episode is for you.
 
Video LINK discussed on pod
 
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 

28-Finding Your Life After: Correen Hardin on Leaving Jehovah’s Witnesses

In this episode of cult.ture, Derek and Trent sit down with Correen Hardin, author of Best Life After, to explore what life can look like after leaving Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Correen shares her personal story of growing up inside the religion, the complex process of leaving, and the emotional and psychological realities that follow when someone steps outside a high-control belief system. The conversation explores identity, autonomy, relationships, and the long process of rebuilding a life after religious deconstruction.
Rather than focusing only on what people leave behind, this episode looks at what comes next, how people begin rediscovering themselves, creating new meaning, and finding their voice again.
This is a thoughtful and honest conversation about belief, identity, and the courage it takes to reclaim your life.
 
About Our Guest
Correen Hardin is the author of Best Life After, a book exploring the journey of rebuilding life after leaving Jehovah’s Witnesses.
📖 Best Life Afterhttps://bookshop.org/p/books/best-life-after-correen-r-hardin/2d356d53a1814687
🌐 Websitehttps://corismaly.com/about-the-autho/
📸 Instagramhttps://instagram.com/444corelyse888
🎵 TikTokhttps://tiktok.com/@444corelyse888
 
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 

27-A Thousand Tiny Cuts: Patriarchy, Control & the Cost of “God’s Will”

On this episode of cult.ture pod we sit down with Katherine Spearing the author of A Thousand Tiny Paper Cuts, founder of Tears of Eden, trauma recovery coach, and survivor of the Christian patriarchy movement.
Katherine grew up in a world where women were expected to move from the authority of their father to the authority of their husband. College wasn’t encouraged. Autonomy wasn’t modeled. And “God’s will” often ended the conversation before it began.
But abuse in high-control systems isn’t always loud.
Sometimes it’s subtle.Sometimes it’s polite.Sometimes it’s spiritual.
In this episode, we explore:
The “stay-at-home daughter” movement
Patriarchy as a control mechanism
Why you can’t argue with God in high-control religion
DARVO and the BITE model in action
The overlap between evangelicalism and cult dynamics
What healing actually looks like after religious trauma
Why living a thriving life may be the most powerful response
Katherine shares how thousands of small spiritual “paper cuts” can build into something life-threatening and how therapy, community, and autonomy helped her rebuild.
If you’ve ever questioned authority…If you were told obedience equals holiness…If your autonomy was framed as rebellion…
This conversation is for you.
 
Connect with Katherine Spearing:https://www.katherinespearing.comInstagramUncertain on SpotifyUncertain on Apple Podcasts
About the Book & Publisher:A Thousand Tiny Paper Cuts published by Lake Drive BooksLake Drive Books on Instagram
Community Resource:Tears of Eden 
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 
 

26-From Shunning to Rebuilding with Griswold House

In this episode, we sit down with McKenzie and Marcell childhood friends who grew up inside Jehovah’s Witnesses, lost each other to shunning, and eventually found their way back to one another after deconstructing.
Marcell shares what it was like growing up in poverty, finding “divine” love inside the organization, and fully believing it was the truth even while quietly believing he would die at Armageddon.
McKenzie opens up about being raised in a fully immersed family system, marrying young, navigating divorce under Watchtower policy, and the moment she realized she could never treat her own children the way she had been treated.
Together, they unpack:
• Love bombing and conditional community• Growing up believing you’re never “good enough• Shunning and rebuilding authentic friendship• Patriarchy and being treated like a pawn• COVID wake-ups & the Australian Royal Commission• The fear of Armageddon even when you’re “doing everything right
Now, on the other side, they’re building something new through Griswold House, a creative venture rooted in authenticity, agency, and chosen community.
Connect with them:
Website: https://griswoldhouse.com/Marcell / GriswoldGriswold Creative House (Business)McKenzie (TikTok)
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and TikTok thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.

25-Finally Waking Up — Fear, False Prophecy, and Life After

Stephanie spent most of her life carrying a fear she didn’t choose.
Raised as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, baptized at just fourteen, and taught from early childhood that the end of the world was “right around the corner,” Stephanie grew up measuring her life in countdowns: 1914, Armageddon, obedience, and survival.
Although she physically left the organization in 1998, the fear never left her.
It wasn’t until February 19, 2025, nearly three decades later, that something finally cracked. A single social media post. A forbidden word: apostate. And a question she’d never allowed herself to ask.
In this episode, Stephanie joins Derek and Trent to share what it’s like to wake up late to realize at fifty years old that your anxiety, your lost opportunities, and your constant guilt were rooted in false prophecy and high-control belief.
We talk about:
Growing up under the shadow of the 1914 doctrine
Being baptized as a minor and the weight of “spiritual contracts”
Living physically out but mentally trapped for decades
Fear-based obedience and the cost of delayed awakening
Grief for a stolen childhood and the courage to reclaim what’s left
This conversation is about what fear does to a human beings and what happens when it finally loosens its grip.
If you’ve ever felt like it’s “too late” to wake up, this episode is for you.
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.
 

24-Put It on the Shelf: Mormonism, Control, and the Cost of Faith

In this episode, we sit down with Amy, who grew up deeply embedded in Mormonism as the daughter of a bishop and mission president.
From early-morning seminary and strict behavioral rules to temple rituals that demand lifelong commitments without full consent, Amy shares what it was like to grow up inside a system that quietly governs every part of life from what you drink to how you think.
Together, we explore Mormonism through the lens of high-control dynamics: obedience, gender hierarchy, secrecy, “putting doubts on the shelf,” and the emotional cost of being told that happiness comes later in the next life, the next kingdom, the next promise.
Amy also speaks candidly about women’s roles in the church, LGBTQ+ exclusion, transactional spirituality, and the slow, painful process of deconstruction not as rebellion, but as self-trust.
This episode is about recognizing when belief becomes control and what it takes to reclaim your voice after leaving a high-demand system. 
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.

23-Leo’s Conversation — The Body Keeps the Truth

Leo grew up Jehovah’s Witness in a home where abuse was happening and being ignored.
In this conversation, Leo speaks about what it means to survive when harm is known, authority goes unquestioned, and silence is treated as righteousness.
This episode explores:
How religious authority can shield abusers
What happens when elders “handle it internally”
Dissociation, lost memory, and trauma held in the body
EMDR therapy and what it means when healing brings truth back
This is not a discussion of belief or doctrine.It’s an account of what happens when systems protect harm and the long, uneven work of surviving what was never acknowledged.
 
Support cult.ture pod over on Patreon
Follow us on Instagram and thanks for rating us 5 stars 🫶
 
Disclaimer:The views and experiences shared on cult.ture are personal and based on the lived experiences of the hosts and guests. This podcast is not intended to attack or defame any individual or religious organization or provide therapy.
Our aim is to foster honest, empathetic conversations about high-control environments, belief systems, and personal journeys including the long road of healing, questioning, and reclaiming identity.
Please be advised that some episodes may contain content that touches on religious trauma, coercive control, emotional or physical abuse, or other potentially triggering topics. We strive to approach these conversations with care, but we acknowledge that certain themes may be difficult to hear.
Listener discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress related to these topics, we encourage seeking support from qualified mental health professionals, spiritual trauma-informed therapists, or trusted recovery communities.
You are not alone.